rz.thegunsofavalon-第28部分
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things in my time that many would consider much worse； and I was not especially troubled by these。 I wrestled with it； not liking to admit it but already knowing the answer。 I cared for the girl。 It was as simple as that。 It was different from the friendship I had felt for Lorraine； with its element of world…weary understanding between two veterans about it； or the air of casual sensuality that had existed briefly between Moire and myself back before I had taken the Pattern for the second time。 It was quite different。 I had known her so briefly that it was most illogical。 I was a man with centuries behind me。 Yet。。。 I had not felt this way in centuries。 I had forgotten the feeling； until now。 I did not want to be in love with her。 Not now。 Later； perhaps。 Better yet； not at all。 She was all wrong for me。 She was a child。 Everything that she would want to do； everything that she would find new and fascinating； I had already done。 No； it was all wrong。 I had no business falling in love with her。 I should not let myself。。。
Ganelon hummed some bawdy tune； badly。 The wagon jounced and creaked； took a turn uphill。 The sun fell upon my face； and I covered my eyes with my forearm。 Somewhere thereabout； oblivion fixed its grip and squeezed。
***
When I awoke； it was past noon and I was feeling grimy。 I took a long drink of water； poured some in the palm of my hand； and rubbed it in my eyes。 I bed my hair with my fingers。 I took a look at our surroundings。
There was greenery about us； small stands of trees and open spaces where tall grasses grew。 It was still a dirt road that we traveled； hard…packed and fairly smooth。 The sky was clear； but for a few small clouds； and shade alternated with sunlight fairly regularly。 There was a light breeze。
〃Back among the living。 Good！〃 said Ganelon； as I climbed over the front wall and took a seat beside him。
〃The horses are getting tired； Corwin； and I'd like to stretch my legs a bit；〃 he said。 〃I'm also getting very hungry。 Aren't you？〃
〃Yes。 Pull off into that shady place to the left and we'll stop awhile。〃
〃I would like to go on a bit farther than that；〃 he said。
〃For any special reason？〃
〃Yes。 I want to show you something。〃
〃Go ahead。〃
We clopped along for perhaps a half a mile； then came to a bend in the road that took us in a more northerly direction。 Before very long we came to a hill； and when we had mounted it there was another hill； leading even higher。
〃How much farther do you want to go？〃 I said。
〃Let's take this next hill；〃 he replied。 〃We might be able to see it from up there。〃
〃All right。〃
The horses strained against the steepness of that second hill； and I got out and pushed from behind。 When we finally reached the top； I felt even grimier from the mixture of sweat and dust； but I was fully awake once more。 Ganelon reined in the horses and put on the brake。 He climbed back in the wagon and up onto a crate then。 He stood； facing to the left； and shaded his eyes。
〃e up here； Corwin；〃 he called。
I climbed over the tailgate and he squatted and extended a hand。 I took it； and he helped me up onto the crate； where I stood beside him。 He pointed； and I followed the gesture。
Perhaps three…quarters of a mile distant； running from left to right for as far as I could see； was a wide； black band。 We were several hundred yards higher than the thing and had a decent view of； I would say； half a mile of its length。 It was several hundred feet across； and though it curved and turned twice that I could see； its width appeared to remain constant。 There were trees within it； and they were totally black。 There seemed to be some movement。 I could not say what it was。 Perhaps it was only the wind rippling the black grasses near its edge。 But there was also a definite sensation of flowing within it； like currents in a flat； dark river。
〃What is it？〃 I said。
〃I thought perhaps you could tell me；〃 Ganelon replied。 〃I had thought it a part of your shadow…sorceries。〃
I shook my head slowly。
〃I was quite drowsy； but I would remember if I had arranged for anything that strange to occur。 How did you know it was there？〃
〃We skirted it several times as you slept； then edged away again。 I did not like the feeling at all。 It was a very familiar one。 Does it not remind you of something？〃
〃Yes。 Yes； it does。 Unfortunately。〃
He nodded。
〃It's like that damned Circle back in Lorraine。 That's what it's like。〃
〃The black road。。。〃 I said。
〃What？〃
〃The black road；〃 I repeated。 〃I did not know what she was referring to when she mentioned it； but now I begin to understand。 This is not good at all。〃
〃Another ill omen？〃
〃I am afraid so。〃
He cursed； then； 〃Will it cause us any immediate trouble？〃 he asked。
〃I don't believe so； but I am not certain。〃
He climbed down from the crate and I followed。
〃Let's find some forage for the horses then；〃 he said； 〃and tend to our own bellies as well。〃
〃Yes。〃
We moved forward and he took the reins。 We found a good spot at the foot of the hill。
We tarried there for the better part of an hour； talking mainly of Avalon。 We did not speak again of the black road； though I thought of it quite a bit。 I had to get a closer look at the thing； of course。
When we were ready to move on； I took the reins again。 The horses； somewhat refreshed； moved out at a good pace。
Ganelon sat beside me on the left； still in a talkative mood。 I was only just then beginning to realize how much this strange homeing had meant to him。 He had revisited many of his old haunts from the days of his outlawry； as well as four battlefields where he had distinguished himself greatly after he had achieved respectability。 I was in many ways moved by his reminiscences。 An unusual mixture of gold and clay； this man。 He should have been an Amberite。
The miles slid by quickly and we were drawing near to the black road again when I felt a familiar mental jab。 I passed the reins to Ganelon。
〃Take them！〃 I said。 〃Drive！〃
〃What is it？〃
〃Later！ Just drive！〃
〃Should I hurry？〃
〃No。 Keep it normal。 Don't say anything for a while。〃
I closed my eyes and rested my head in my hands； emptying my mind and building a wall around the emptiness。 No one home。 Out to lunch。 No solicitors。 This property is vacant。 Do not disturb。 Trespassers will be prosecuted。 Beware of dog。 Falling rock。 Slippery when wet。 To be razed for urban renewal。。。
It eased； then came on again； hard； and I blocked it again。 There followed a third wave。 I stopped that one； too。
Then it was gone。
I sighed； massaged my eyeballs。
〃It's all right now；〃 I said。
〃What happened？〃
〃Someone tried to reach me by a very special means。 It was almost certainly Benedict。 He must just now have found out any of a number of things that could make him want to stop us。 I'll take the reins again now。 I fear he will be on our trail soon。〃
Ganelon handed them over。
〃What are our chances of escaping him？〃
〃Pretty fair now。 I'd say； that we've got more distance behind us。 I am going to shuffle some more shadows as soon as my head stops spinning。〃
I guided us on； and our way twisted and wound； paralleling that black road for a time； then heading in closer to it。 Finally； we were only a few hundred yards away from it。
Ganelon studied it in silence for a long while； then said； 〃It reminds me too much of that other place。 The little tongues of mist that lick about things； the feeling that something is always moving just at the corner of your eye。。。〃
I bit my lip。 I began to perspire heavily。 I was trying to shift away from the thing now and there was some sort of resistance。 It was not the same feeling of monolithic immovability as occurs when you try to move through Shadow in Amber。 It was altogether different。 It was a feeling of … inescapability。
We moved through Shadow all right。 The sun drifted higher in the heavens； heading back toward noonday … for I did not relish the thought of nightfall beside that black strip … and the sky lost something of its blue and the trees shot higher about us and mountains appeared in the distance。
Was it that the road cut through Shadow itself？
It must。 Why else would Julian and Gerard have located it and been sufficiently intrigued to explore the thing？
It was unfortunate； but I feared we had much in mon； that road and I。 Damn it！
We moved beside it for a long while； gradually moving closer together； also。 Soon； only about a hundred feet separated us。 Fifty。。。
。。。 And； as I had felt they eventually must； our paths finally intersected。
I drew rein。 I packed my pipe and lit it； smoked as I studied the thing。 Star and Firedrake obviously did not approve of the black area that cut across our way。 They had whinnied and tried to pull off to the side。
It was a long； diagonal cut across the black place if we wanted to keep to the road。 Also； part of the terrain was hidden from our sight by a series of low； stone hills。 There were heavy grasses at the edge of the black and patches of it； here and there； about the foot of the hills。 Bits of mist scudded among them and faint； vaporous clouds hovered in all the hollows。 The sky； seen through the atmosphere that hung about the place； was se
