cb.booksofblood2-第17部分

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　'And　what　do　I　offer　you　in　return　for　such　largesse？'
　'I　want　to　learn　…'
　'Learn？'
　'…　how　to　use　power。'
　She　was　stranger　and　stranger；　this　one。
　'What　do　you　mean？'　he　replied；　playing　for　time。　He　hadn't　got　the　measure　of　her；　she　vexed　him；　confounded　him。
　'Shall　I　recite　it　for　you　again；　in　bourgeois？'　she　said；　playing　insolence　with　such　a　smile　he　almost　felt　attractive　again。
　'No　need。　You　want　to　learn　to　use　power。　I　suppose　I　could　teach　you　…'
　'I　know　you　can。'
　'You　realize　I'm　a　married　man。　Virginia　and　I　have　been　together　eighteen　years。'
　'You　have　three　sons；　four　houses；　a　maid…servant　called　Mirabelle。　You　loathe　New　York；　and　you　love　Bangkok；　your　shirt　collar　is　161/2；　your　favourite　colour　green。'
　'Turquoise。'
　'You're　getting　subtler　in　your　old　age。'
　'I'm　not　old。'
　'Eighteen　years　a　married　man。　It　ages　you　prematurely。'
　'Not　me。'
　'Prove　it。'
　'How？'
　'Take　me。'
　'What？'
　'Take　me。'
　'Here？'
　'Draw　the　blinds；　lock　the　door；　turn　off　the　puter　terminal；　and　take　me。　I　dare　you。'
　'Dare？'
　How　long　was　it　since　anyone　had　dared　him　to　do　anything？
　'Dare？'
　He　was　excited。　He　hadn't　been　so　excited　in　a　dozen　years。　He　drew　the　blinds；　locked　the　door；　turned　off　the　video　display　of　his　fortunes。
　My　God；　she　thought；　I've　got　him。
　
　It　wasn't　an　easy　passion；　not　like　that　with　Vassi。　For　one　thing；　Pettifer　was　a　clumsy；　uncultured　lover。　For　another；　he　was　too　nervous　of　his　wife　to　be　a　wholly　successful　adulterer。　He　thought　he　saw　Virginia　everywhere：　in　the　lobbies　of　the　hotels　they　took　a　room　in　for　the　afternoon；　in　cabs　cruising　the　street　outside　their　rendezvous；　once　even　（he　swore　the　likeness　was　exact）　dressed　as　a　waitress；　and　swabbing　down　a　table　in　a　restaurant。　All　fictional　fears；　but　they　dampened　the　spontaneity　of　the　romance　somewhat。
　Still；　she　was　learning　from　him。　He　was　as　brilliant　a　potentate　as　he　was　inept　a　lover。　She　learned　how　to　be　powerful　without　exercising　power；　how　to　keep　one's　self　uncontaminated　by　the　foulness　all　charisma　stirs　up　in　the　uncharismatic；　how　to　make　the　plain　decisions　plainly；　how　to　be　merciless。　Not　that　she　needed　much　education　in　that　particular　quarter。　Perhaps　it　was　more　truthful　to　say　he　taught　her　never　to　regret　her　absence　of　instinctive　passion；　but　to　judge　with　her　intellect　alone　who　deserved　extinction　and　who　might　be　numbered　amongst　the　righteous。
　Not　once　did　she　show　herself　to　him；　though　she　used　her　skills　in　the　most　secret　of　ways　to　tease　pleasure　out　of　his　stale　nerves。
　In　the　fourth　week　of　their　affair　they　were　lying　side　by　side　in　a　lilac　room；　while　the　mid…afternoon　traffic　growled　in　the　street　below。　It　had　been　a　bad　bout　of　sex；　he　was　nervous；　and　no　tricks　would　coax　him　out　of　himself。　It　was　over　quickly；　almost　without　heat。
　He　was　going　to　tell　her　something。　She　knew　it：　it　was　waiting；　this　revelation；　somewhere　at　the　back　of　his　throat。　Turning　to　him　she　massaged　his　temples　with　her　mind；　and　soothed　him　into　speech。
　He　was　about　to　spoil　the　day。
　He　was　about　to　spoil　his　career。
　He　was　about；　God　help　him；　to　spoil　his　life。
　'I　have　to　stop　seeing　you；'　he　said。
　He　wouldn't　dare；　she　thought。
　'I'm　not　sure　what　I　know　about　you；　or　rather；　what　I　think　I　know　about　you；　but　it　makes　me。　。　。　cautious　of　you；　J。　Do　you　understand？'
　'No。'
　'I'm　afraid　I　suspect　you　of。　。　。　crimes。'
　'Crimes？'
　'You　have　a　history。'
　'Who's　been　rooting？'　she　asked。　'Surely　not　Virginia？'
　'No；　not　Virginia；　she's　beyond　curiosity。'
　'Who　then？'
　'It's　not　your　business。'
　'Who？'
　She　pressed　lightly　on　his　temples。　It　hurt　him　and　he　winced。
　'What's　wrong？'　she　asked。
　'My　head's　aching。'
　'Tension；　that's　all；　just　tension。　I　can　take　it　away；　Titus。'　She　touched　her　fingers　to　his　forehead；　relaxing　her　hold　on　him。　He　sighed　as　relief　came。
　'Is　that　better？'
　'Yes。'
　'Who's　been　snooping；　Titus？'
　
　'I　have　a　personal　secretary。　Lyndon。　You've　heard　me　speak　of　him。　He　knew　about　our　relationship　from　the　beginning。　Indeed；　he　books　the　hotels；　arranges　my　cover　stories　for　Virginia。'
　There　was　a　sort　of　boyishness　in　this　speech；　that　was　rather　touching。　As　though　he　was　embarrassed　to　leave　her；　rather　than　heartbroken。　'Lyndon's　quite　a　miracle…worker。　He's　maneuvered　a　lot　of　things　to　make　it　easier　between　us。　So　he's　got　nothing　against　you。　It's　just　that　he　happened　to　see　one　of　the　photographs　I　took　of　you。　I　gave　them　to　him　to　shred。'
　'Why？'
　'I　shouldn't　have　taken　them；　it　was　a　mistake。　Virginia　might　have。。　。'　He　paused；　began　again。　'Anyhow；　he　recognized　you；　although　he　couldn't　remember　where　he'd　seen　you　before。'
　'But　he　remembered　eventually。'
　'He　used　to　work　for　one　of　my　newspapers；　as　a　gossip　columnist。　That's　how　he　came　to　be　my　personal　assistant。　He　remembered　you　from　your　previous　incarnation；　as　it　were。　Jacqueline　Ess；　the　wife　of　Benjamin　Ess；　deceased。'
　'Deceased。'
　'He　brought　me　some　other　photographs；　not　as　pretty　as　the　ones　of　you。'
　'Photographs　of　what？'
　'Your　home。　And　the　body　of　your　husband。　They　said　it　was　a　body；　though　in　God's　name　there　was　precious　little　human　being　left　in　it。'
　'There　was　precious　little　to　start　with；'　she　said　simply；　thinking　of　Ben's　cold　eyes；　and　colder　hands。　Fit　only　to　be　shut　up；　and　forgotten。
　'What　happened？'
　'To　Ben？　He　was　killed。'
　'How？'　Did　his　voice　waver　a　little？
　'Very　easily。'　She　had　risen　from　the　bed；　and　was　standing　by　the　window。　Strong　summer　light　carved　its　way　through　the　slats　of　the　blind；　ridges　of　shadow　and　sunlight　charting　the　contours　of　her　face。
　'You　did　it。'
　'Yes。'　He　had　taught　her　to　be　plain。　'Yes；　I　did　it。'
　He　had　taught　her　an　economy　of　threat　too。　'Leave　me；　and　I'll　do　the　same　again。'
　He　shook　his　head。　'Never。　You　wouldn't　dare。'
　He　was　standing　in　front　of　her　now。
　'We　must　understand　each　other；　J。　I　am　powerful　and　I　am　pure。　Do　you　see？　My　public　face　isn't　even　touched　by　a　glimmer　of　scandal。　I　could　afford　a　mistress；　a　dozen　mistresses；　to　be　revealed。　But　a　murderess？　No；　that　would　spoil　my　life。'
　'Is　he　blackmailing　you？　This　Lyndon？'
　He　stared　at　the　day　through　the　blinds；　with　a　crippled　look　on　his　face。　There　was　a　twitch　in　the　nerves　of　his　cheek；　under　his　left　eye。
　'Yes；　if　you　must　know；'　he　said　in　a　dead　voice。　'The　bastard　has　me　for　all　I'm　worth。'
　'I　see。'
　'And　if　he　can　guess；　so　can　others。　You　understand？'
　'I'm　strong：　you're　strong。　We　can　twist　them　around　our　little　fingers。'
　'No。'
　'Yes！　I　have　skills；　Titus。'
　'I　don't　want　to　know。'
　'You　will　know；'　she　said。
　She　looked　at　him；　taking　hold　of　his　hands　without　touching　him。　He　watched；　all　astonished　eyes；　as　his　unwilling　hands　were　raised　to　touch　her　face；　to　stroke　her　hair　with　the　fondest　of　gestures。　She　made　him　run　his　trembling　fingers　across　her　breasts；　taking　them　with　more　ardour　than　he　could　summon　on　his　own　initiative。
　'You　are　always　too　tentative；　Titus；'　she　said；　making　him　paw　her　almost　to　the　point　of　bruising。　'This　is　how　I　like　it。'　Now　his　hands　were　lower；　fetching　out　a　different　look　from　her　face。　Tides　were　moving　over　it；　she　was　all　alive　…'Deeper　…'
　His　finger　intruded；　his　thumb　stroked。
　'I　like　that；　Titus。　Why　can't　you　do　that　to　me　without　me　demanding？'
　He　blushed。　He　didn't　like　to　talk　about　what　they　did　together。　She　coaxed　him　deeper；　whispering。
　'I　won't　break；　you　know。　Virginia　may　be　Dresden　china；　I'm　not。　I　want　feeling；　I　want　something　that　I　can　remember　you　by　when　I'm　not　with　you。　Nothing　is　everlasting；　is　it？　But　I　want　something　to　keep　me　warm　through　the　night。'
　He　was　sinking　to　his　knees；　his　hands　kept；　by　her　design；　on　her　and　in　her；　still　roving　like　two　lustful　crabs。　His　body　was　awash　with　sweat。　It　was；　she　thought；　the　first　time　she'd　ever　seen　him　sweat。
　'Don't　kill　me；'　he　whimpered。
　'I　could　wipe　you　out。'　Wipe；　she　thought；　then　put　the　image　out　of　her　mind　before　she　did　him　some　harm。
　'I　know。　I　know；'　he　said。　'You　can　kill　me　easily。'
　He　was　crying。　My　God；　she　thought；　the　great　man　is　at　my　feet；　sobbing　like　a　baby。　What　can　I　learn　of　power　from　this　puerile　performance？　She　plucked　the　tears　off　his　cheeks；　using　rather　more　strength　than　the　task　required。　His　skin　reddened　under　her　gaze。
　'Let　me　be；　J。　I　can't　help　you。　I'm　useless　to　you。'
　
　It　was　true。　He　was　absolutely　useless。　Contemptuously；　she　let　his　hands　go。　They　fell　limply　by　his　sides。
　'Don't　ever　try　and　find　me；　Titus。　You　understand？　Don't　ever　send　your　minions　after　me　to　preserve　your　reputation；　because　I　will　be　more　merciless　than　you've　ever　been。'
　He　said　nothing；　just　knelt　there；　facing　the　window；　while　she　washed　her　face；　drank　the　coffee　they'd　ordered；　and　left。
　
　Lyndon　was　surprised　to　find　the　door　of　his　office　ajar。　It　was　only　seven…thirty…six。　None　of　the　secretaries　would　be　in　for　another　hour。　Clearly　one　of　the　cleaners　had　been　remiss；　leaving　the　door　unlocked。　He'd　find　out　who：　sack　her。
　He　pushed　the　door　open。
　Jacquel