anner.bloodandgold-第66部分

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　ancient　and　mysterious　charms。
　　　Only　occasionally　did　I　see　Bianca　hand　the　poisoned　cup　to　one　of　her　ill…fated　guests。　Only　occasionally　did　I　feel　the　beat　of　her　dark　heart；　and　see　the　shadow　of　desperate　guilt　in　the　very　depth　of　her　eyes。　How　she　watched　the　unfortunate　victim；　how　she　saw　him　out　of　her　pany　at　last　with　a　subtle　smile。
　　　As　for　Amadeo；　our　private　sessions　within　my　bedchamber　became　ever　more　intimate。　And　more　than　once；　as　we　embraced；　I　gave　the　Blood　Kiss　to　him；　watching　his　body　shiver；　and　seeing　the　power　of　it　in　his　half…lidded　eyes。
　　　What　was　this　madness？　Was　he　for　the　world　or　for　me？
　　　How　I　Hed　to　myself　about　it。　I　told　myself　the　boy　might　still　prove　himself　and　thereby　earn　his　freedom　to　leave　me；　safe　and　rich；　for　acplishments　beyond　my　house。
　　　But　I　had　given　him　so　much　of　the　Secret　Blood　that　he　pushed　me　with　questions。　What　manner　of　creature　was　I？　Why　did　I　never　e　by　day？　Why　did　I　take　no　food　or　drink？
　　　He　wrapped　his　warm　arms　around　the　mystery；　He　buried　his　face　in　the　monster's　neck。
　　　I　sent　him　off　to　the　best　brothels　to　learn　the　pleasures　of　women；　and　the　pleasures　of　boys。　He　hated　me　for　it；　and　yet　he　enjoyed　it；　and　he　came　home　to　me　eager　for　the　Blood　Kiss　and
　　　　nothing　else。
　　　He　taunted　me　when　I　painted　alone；　except　for　him；　in　my　studio；　working　furiously；　creating　some　landscape　or　gathering　of　ancient　heroes。　He　slept　beside　me　when　I　collapsed　in　my　bed　to　sleep　the　last　few　hours　before　dawn。
　　　Meantime；　we　opened　the　palazzo　again　and　yet　again。　Bianca；　ever　the　clever　and　poised　one；　had　outgrown　her　early　beauty；　and　　preserving　her　delicate　face　and　manner；　had　now　the　polish　of　a　woman　rather　than　the　promise　of　a　girl。
　　　Often　I　found　myself　staring　at　her；　wondering　what　would　have　happened　if　I　had　not　turned　my　attention　to　him。　Why　after　all　had　I　done　it？　Could　I　not　have　wooed　her　and　persuaded　her；　and　then；　thinking　these　thoughts；　I　realized；　foolishly；　that　I　might　still　choose　to　do　so；　and　cast　him　off；　with　wealth　and　position；　to　mortality　with　all　the　rest　of　my　boys。
　　　No；　she　was　saved。
　　　Amadeo　was　the　one　I　wanted。　Amadeo　wag　the　one　I　was　educating；　training　Amadeo　was　the　precious　student　of　the　Blood。
　　　The　nights　passed　swiftly；　as　if　in　a　dream。　　Several　boys　went　off　to　university。　One　of　the　teachers　died。　　Vincenzo　took　to　walking　with　a　limp；　but　I　hired　an　assistant　to　fetch　for　him。　Bianca　rearranged　several　of　the　large　paintings。　The　air　was　warm　and　the　windows　were　open。　On　the　roof　garden　we　gathered　for　a　great　banquet。　The　boys　sang。
　　　Never　once　in　all　this　time　did　I　fail　to　apply　the　salve　to　my　skin　to　darken　it　and　make　me　appear　human。　Never　once　did　I　fail　to　work　it　into　the　flesh　of　both　my　hands。　Never　once　did　I　fail　to　dress　with　fine　jewels；　and　wear　rings　that　would　distract　everyone。　Never　once　did　I　move　too　close　to　a　grouping　of　candles；　or　a　torch　at　a　doorway　or　on　the　quais。
　　　I　went　to　the　shrine　of　Those　Who　Must　Be　Kept　and　remained　there　in　meditation。　I　laid　the　case　before　Akasha。
　　　I　wanted　this　child…this　boy　who　was　now　two　years　older　than　when　I'd　found　him…and　yet　I　wanted　everything　else　for　him；　and　my　soul　was　torn；　just　as　his　heart　was　torn。
　　　Never　before　had　I　wanted　such　a　thing；　to　make　a　blood　drinker　for　my　own　panionship；　indeed　to　educate　a　mortal　youth　for　this　very　purpose；　and　to　groom　him　expertly　that　he　might　be　the　finest　choice。
　　　But　I　wanted　it　now　and　it　filled　my　thoughts　during　eveiy　waking　hour；　and　I　found　no　consolation　looking　at　my　cold　Mother　and　Father。　I　heard　no　answer　to　my　prayer。
　　　I　lay　down　to　sleep　in　the　shrine　and　knew　only　dark　and　troubled　dreams。
　　　I　saw　the　garden；　the　very　one　I　had　painted　on　the　walls　eternally；　and　I　was　walking　in　it　as　always；　and　there　was　fruit　on　the　low…hanging　trees。　There　came　Amadeo　walking　near　me；　and　suddenly　there　came　from　his　mouth　a　chilling　cruel　laughter。
　　　〃A　sacrifice？〃　he　asked；　〃for　Bianca？　How　can　such　a　thing　be？〃
　　　I　woke　with　a　start；　and　sat　up；　rubbing　the　backs　of　my　arms；　and　shaking　my　head；　trying　to　free　myself　from　the　dream。
　　　〃I　don't　know　the　answer；〃　I　whispered；　as　though　he　were　there　near　me；　as　though　his　spirit　had　traveled　to　die　place　where　I　sat。
　　　〃Except　she　was　already　a　young　woman　when　I　came　upon　her；〃　I　responded；　〃educated　and　forced　into　life；　indeed　a　murderess；　yes；　indeed；　a　murderess；　a　child　woman　guilty　of　dreadful　crimes。　And　you；　you　were　a　helpless　child。　I　could　mold　you　and　change　you；　all　of　which　I've　done。
　　　〃It's　true；　I　thought　you　were　a　painter；〃　I　continued；　〃that　you　had　the　gift　for　painting；　and　I　know　that　it's　still　in　you；　and　that　did　sway　me；　too。　But　when　all　is　said　and　done；　I　don't　know　why　you　distracted　me；　only　that　it　was　done。〃
　　　I　lay　back　down　to　sleep　once　more；　lying　on　my　side　rather　carelessly；
　　　　staring　up　at　the　glimmering　eye　of　Akasha。　At　the　harsh　lines　of　the　face　of　Enkil。
　　　I　thought　back　over　the　centuries　to　Eudoxia。　I　remembered　her　terrible　death。　I　remembered　her　burning　body　as　it　lay　upon　the　floor　of　the　shrine　in　the　very　place　where　I　lay　now。
　　　I　thought　of　Pandora。　Where　is　my　Pandora？　And　then　finally　I　drifted　into　sleep。
　　　When　I　returned　to　the　palazzo；　ing　down　from　the　roof　as　was　always　my　custom；　things　were　not　as　I　would　have　them；　for　all　the　pany　was　solemn　at　supper；　and　Vincenzo　told　me　anxiously　that　a　〃strange　man〃　had　e　to　visit　me；　and　that　he　stood　in　the　anteroom　and　would　not　e　in。
　　　The　boys　had　been　finishing　one　of　my　murals　in　the　anteroom；　and　they　had　hastily　left　this　〃strange　man〃　to　himself。　Only　Amadeo　had　remained　behind；　doing　some　small　work　with　little　enthusiasm；　his　eyes　upon　this　〃strange　man〃　in　a　manner　which　gave　Vmcenzp　concern。
　　　As　if　that　were　not　enough；　Bianca　had　been　to　visit；　indeed　to　give　me　a　gift　from　Florence；　a　small　painting　by　Botticelli；　and　she　had　had　〃uneasy〃　conversation　with　this　〃strange　man〃　and　had　told　Vincenzo　to　keep　watch　on　him。　Bianca　was　gone。　The　〃strange　man〃　remained。　I　went　into　die　anteroom　immediately；　but　I　had　felt　the　presence　of　this　creature　before　I　saw　who　it　was。　It　was　Mael。
　　　Not　for　a　single　second　did　I　not　know　him。　He　was　unchanged　just　as　I　am　unchanged；　and　he　had　not　paid　much　attention　to　the　fashion　of　these　times；　any　more　than　he　had　paid　attention　to　the　fashion　of　times　in　the　past。
　　　He　looked　dreadful　in　fact　in　a　ragged　leather　jerkin　and　leggings　with　holes　in　them　and　his　boots　were　tied　with　rope。
　　　His　hair　was　dirty　and　tangled　but　his　face　wore　an　amazingly　pleasant
　　　
　　　　expression；　and　when　he　saw　me　he　came　at　once　to　me　and　embraced　me。
　　　〃You're　really　here；〃　he　said　in　a　low　voice；　as　though　we　had　to　whisper　under　my　roof。　He　spoke　the　old　Latin。　〃I　heard　of　it　but　I　didn't　believe　it。　Oh；　I'm　so　glad　to　see　you。　I'm　glad　you're　still。　。　。〃
　　　〃Yes；　I　know　what　you　mean　to　say；〃　I　said。　〃I'm　still　the　watcher　of　the　years　passing；　I'm　still　the　witness　surviving　in　the　Blood。〃
　　　〃Oh；　you　put　it　far　better　than　I　could；〃　he　answered。　〃But　let　me　say　it　again；　I'm　so　happy　to　see　you；　happy　to　hear　your　voice。〃
　　　I　saw　that　there　was　dust　all　over　him。　He　was　looking　about　the　room；　at　its　fancy　painted　ceiling　with　its　ring　of　cherubs　and　its　gold　leaf。　He　stared　at　the　unfinished　mural。　I　wondered　if　he　knew　it　was　my　work。
　　　〃Mael；　always　the　astonished　one；〃　I　said；　moving　him　gently　put　of　the　light　of　the　candles。　I　laughed　softly。　〃You　lopk　like　a　tramp。〃
　　　〃Would　you　offer　me　clothes　again？〃　he　asked。　〃I　cannot　really；　you　know；　master　such　things。　I　am　in　need；　I　suppose。　And　you　live　so　splendidly　here　as　you　always　did。　Is　nothing　ever　a　mystery　to　you；　Marius？〃
　　　〃Everything　is　a　mystery；　Mael；〃　I　responded。　〃But　fine　clothes　I　always　have。　If　the　world　es　to　an　end；　I　shall　be　well　dressed　for　it；　whether　it　is　by　the　light　of　day　or　in　the　dark　of　night。〃
　　　I　took　his　arm　and　guided　him　through　the　various　immense　rooms　that　lay　between　me　and　my　bedchamber。　He　was　suitably　awed　by　the　paintings　everywhere　and　let　me　lead　him　along。
　　　〃I　want　you　to　stay　here；　away　from　my　mortal　pany；〃　I　said。　〃You'll　only　confuse　them。〃
　　　〃Ah；　but　you've　worked　it　all　so　well；〃　he　said。　〃It　was　easier　for　you　in　old　Rome；　wasn't　it？　But　what　a　palace　you　have　here。　There　are　kings　who　would　envy　you；　Marius。〃
　　　〃Yes；　it　seems　so；〃　I　answered　offhandedly。
　　　I　went　to　the　adjacent　closets；　which　were　small　rooms　actually；　and　pulled　out　clothes　for　him；　and　leather　shoes。　He　seemed　quite　incapable　of　dressing　himself　but　I　refused　to　do　it　for　him；　and　after　I　had　put　out　everything；　on　the　velvet　bed　in　the　correct　order；　as　if　for　a　child　or　an　idiot；　he　began　to　examine　various　articles　as　if　he　might　manage　alone。
　　　〃Who　told　you　I　was　here；　Mael？〃　I　asked　him。
　　　He　glanced　at　me；　and　his　face　was　cold　for　a　moment；　the　old　hawk　nose　as　disagreeable　as　ever；　the　deep…set　eyes　rather　more　brilliant　than　I'd　remembered　and　the　mouth　far　better　shaped　than　I'd　recalled。　Maybe　time　had　softened　the　set　of　his　lips。　I'm　not　c