cwilleford.theburntorangeheresy-第22部分
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Debierue's 〃hiding〃 of the key was evidently a habitual practice； a safeguard to prevent its loss as he walked to and from the theater each night。 I doubted that the idea entered his head that I would return to his empty house to make an illegal use of the key。 But I didn't really know。 My guilt； if any； was light。 I felt no more guilt than that of a professional burglar。 A burglar must make a living； and to steal he must first invade the locked home where the items he wants to steal are safeguarded。 I meant no harm to the old artist。 Any picture I took； and I was only going to take one； Debierue could paint again。 And except for the visual impressions of his paintings in my mind…and a few photos…I would take nothing else。There was no reason to feel guilty。
So I cannot account for the dryness of my mouth； the dull stasis of my blood； the tightness of the muscles surrounding my stomach； and the noticeable increase in my rate of breathing。 These signs of anxiety were ridiculous。 The old man was sitting in the drive…in with a pair of headphones clamped to his ears； and even if he caught me inside the house； the worst he could do would be to express dismay。 He couldn't hurt me physically； and he would hardly report me to the police。 But I was an amateur。 I had never broken into anyone's house before； so I supposed that my anxiety stemmed from the melodramatic idea that I was engaged in a romantic adventure。 But after I had unlocked the front door and let it swing inward； I had to muster a good deal of courage before I could force my hand to reach inside to flip on the living room lights。
The light ing through the window would be bright enough to see my way back from the car。 I switched off the headlights； and returned hurriedly to the house with a tire iron and a hammer I got from the trunk。 But as it turned out； these tools were unnecessary。
The only barrier to the studio was the hasp and the heavy Yale lock on the door。 Once broken there would be no way to prevent Debierue from guessing that I had returned。 But if the artist had been afraid he might lose his house key； it also seemed unlikely that he would take the studio padlock key to the theater。
Switching on the lights as I searched； I made a hasty； fruitless examination of the kitchen before moving on to the bedroom。 Two keys together on a short twist of copper wire； both of them identical； were in plain view on top of the highboy dresser。 I unlocked the padlock； opened the studio door； and flipped the row of toggles on the wall。 The boxlike windowless room； after hesitant blue white flickers； brightened into an icy； intense brilliance。 There were a dozen overhead fluorescent tubes in parallel sets of three （two blue white to one yellow） flush with the ceiling。 Under this cold light I noticed first the patching of new brickwork that filled the spaces where two windows had been before； despite the new coat of white enamel that covered the walls。
Blinking my eyes to accustom them to the intense overhead light； I closed the door behind me。 My thumping heart was prepared for the impact of the unusual； the unique； for the miraculous in visual art； but instead of wine and fish I didn't find even bread and water。
There were canvases； at least two dozen of them； and all of these pristine canvases were the same size； 24〃 x 30〃。 They were stacked in white plastic racks against the western wall。 The racks were the mercial kind one often finds in art supply stores。 I checked every one of these glittering white canvases。 None of them had been touched by paint or charcoal。
There was a new； gunmetal desk in the southwest corner of the studio； with a matching chair cushioned in light gray Naugahyde。 On the desk there was a fruit jar filled with sharpened pencils and ballpoint pens； a square glass paperweight （slightly magnified） holding down some correspondence； and a beautiful desk calendar （an Almanacco Artistica Italiano product in brilliant colors； made by Alfieri & Lacroix； Milano）。 Without shame； I read the two letters that had been held down by the paperweight。 One was a letter from a Parisian clipping service； stating that Debierue's name had been mentioned twice in the foreword to a new art history pictorial collection； but inasmuch as the illustrated volume was quite expensive； the manager had written to the publisher and requested a courtesy copy for Debierue。 He would send it along as soon as…or if…he received it。 There was a news clipping from Paris Soir； an unsigned review of a Man Ray retrospective exhibit in Paris； and Debierue's name was mentioned； together with the names of a dozen other artists； in a listing of Dadaists who had known Man Ray during the 1920s。
Debierue had answered the manager of the clipping service in a crabbed； backhanded script with cursive letters so microscopic he must have written the letter with the aid of the magnified paperweight。 He merely told the manager not to send the book if he got a free copy； and not to buy it if he did not。 Except for Debierue's surname （the tiny lowercase letters 〃e〃 through 〃e〃 were all contained within a large capital 〃D〃） there was no plimentary closing。 Debierue had a unique signature。 I folded the letter and put it into the breast pocket of my jumpsuit。
As I looked through the unlocked drawers of the desk； I found nothing else to hold my interest； except for a scrapbook of clippings。 The scrapbook； 10〃 x 12k； bound in gray cardboard covers； was less than half filled； and from the first clipping to the last one pasted in； covered an eighteenmonth period。 Most of the earlier clippings were reports of the fire that had burned down his villa； similar accounts from many different newspapers。 The more recent clippings were shorter…like the mention of his name in the Man Ray art review。 The items in the other drawers were what one expects to find。 Stationery and supplies； stamps； glue； correspondence in manila folders…unusual perhaps because of the meticulous neatness one doesn't associate with desk drawers。
There was a two…shelf； imitation walnut bookcase beside the desk that held about thirty books。 Most of them were paperbacks； five policiers from the Sêrie Noire； three Simenons and two by Chester Himes； Pascal's Pensêes； From Caligari to Hitler； Godard on Godard； an autographed copy of Samuel Beckett's Proust； and several paperback novels by French authors I had never heard of before。 The hard…cover books were all well worn。 A French…English dictionary and a French…German dictionary； in library reference size； a tattered copy of Heidi （in German）； a boxed two…volume edition of Schopenhauer's The World as Will and Idea （also in German）； Les Fleurs du Mal； and an autographed copy of August Hauptmann's Debierue。 I fought down my impulse to steal the autographed copy of Beckett's Proust； the only book in the small library！ coveted； and scribbled the list of book titles into my notebook。
In addition to the books； there were several neat piles of art magazines； including Fine Arts： The Americas； all of them in chronological order； with the most recent issues on the top of each stack； arranged along the wall。 I considered leafing through these magazines to look for drawings； but it would be absurd for Debierue； with his keen sense of order； to hide sketches in magazines。
In the center of the studio was a maple worktable （in furniture catalogues； they are called 〃Early American Harvest〃 tables）； and this table； in a rather finicky arrangement； held a terracotta jar with several new camel'shair brushes in varying lengths and brush widths； four rubber…banded； faggoty bundles of charcoal drawing sticks； four one…quart cans of linseed oil and four one…quart cans of turpentine； all unopened； and a long row of king…sized tubes of oil paint in almost every shade and tint on the spectrum。
There were at least a hundred tubes of oil paint； in colors； and three of zinc white。 None of the tubes had been opened or squeezed。 There was a square piece of clear glass； about 12〃 x 12〃； a fumed oak artist's palette； a pair of white gloves （size 9 1/2）； a twelve…inch brass ruler； a palette knife； an unopened box of assorted color pencils； and a heaped flat pile of clean white rags。 There were other unused art materials as well； but the crushing impression of this neatly ordered table was that of a mercial layout of art materials in an art supply showroom。
Beside the table was an unpainted wooden A…frame easel and a tall metal kitchen stool painted in white enamel。 There was an untouched 24〃 x 30' canvas on the easel。 Bewildered； and with a feeling of nausea in the pit of my stomach； I climbed onto the high stool facing the easel and lit a cigarette。 A single silver filament； a spider's let…down thread； shimmering in the brilliant light washing the room from the overhead fluorescents； trailed from the right…hand corner of the canvas to the floor。 The spider who had left this evidence of passage had disappeared。
Except for the pole…axed numbness of a steer； my mind was too stunned for a contiguous reaction of any kind。 I neither laughed nor cried。 For minutes I was unable to formulate any coherent thoughts； not until the cigarette burned my fingers； and even then I remember look
