rh.royalassassin-第96部分
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ouetted against the dancing flames of a small fire he had kindled there。 There was a peculiar stillness to him； no jingling of bells； no tumbling mocking words。
〃Dinner was insufferable；〃 I told him。 I did not bother with candles。 My headache had not been entirely a fiction。 I sat； then lay back on my bed with a sigh。 〃I do not know what Buckkeep is ing to； nor what I can do about it。〃
〃Perhaps what you have already done is enough？〃 the Fool ventured。
〃I've done nothing noteworthy lately；〃 I informed him。 〃Unless you count knowing when to stop talking back to Regal。〃
〃Ah。 That's a skill we're all learning； then；〃 he agreed morosely。 He drew his knees up to his chin； rested his arms atop them。 He took a breath。 〃Have you no news； then； that you'd care to share with a Fool？ A very discreet Fool？〃
〃I've no news to share with you that you would not already know； and probably sooner than I did。〃 The darkness of the room was restful。 My headache was easing。
〃Ah。〃 He paused delicately。 〃Shall I； perhaps； ask a question？ To be answered or not as you see fit？〃
〃Save your breath and ask it。 You know you shall； whether I give you permission or no。〃
〃Indeed； there you are right。 Well then。 The question。 Ah； I surprise myself； I blush； I do。 FitzChivalry； have you made a fitz of your own？〃
I sat up slowly on my bed and stared at him。 He did not move nor flinch。 〃What did you ask me？〃 I demanded quietly。
He spoke softly； almost apologetically now。 〃I must know。 Is Molly carrying your child？〃
I sprang at him from the bed； caught him by the throat； and dragged him up to his feet。 I drew back my fist； and then stopped； shocked by what the firelight revealed on his face。
〃Batter away；〃 he suggested quietly。 〃New bruises will not show much atop the old ones。 I can creep about unseen for a few more days。〃
I snatched my hand back from him。 Strange； how the act I had been about to mit now seemed so monstrous when I discovered someone else had already done it。 As soon as I released him； he turned away from me； as if his discolored and swollen face shamed him。 Perhaps the pallor of his skin and his delicate bone structure made it all the more horrifying to me。 It was as if someone had done this to a child。 I knelt by the fire and began to build it up。
〃Didn't get a good enough look？〃 the Fool asked acidly。 〃I'll warn you； it gets no better by giving more light to it。〃
〃Sit on my clothes chest and take your shirt off；〃 I told him brusquely。 He didn't move。 I ignored that。 I had a small kettle for tea water。 This I set to heat。 I lit a branch of candles and set them atop the table； and then took out my small store of herbs。 I did not keep that many in my room； I wished now I had Burrich's full store to draw on； but I was sure that if I left to go to the stables； the Fool would be gone when I returned。 Still； those I kept in my room were mostly for bruises and cuts and the types of injuries my other profession exposed me to most often。 They would do。
When the water was warm； I poured some into my washbasin and added a generous handful of herbs； crushing them as I did so。 I found an outgrown shirt in my clothing chest and tore it into rags。 〃e into the light。〃 This I phrased as a request。 After a moment he did so； but moving hesitantly and shyly。 I looked at him briefly； then took him by the shoulders and sat him down atop my clothing chest。 〃What happened to you？〃 I asked； awed by the damage to his face。 His lips were cut and swollen； and one eye swollen near closed。
〃I've been going about Buckkeep； asking bad…tempered individuals if they've fathered bastards lately。〃 His one good eye met my glare straight on。 Red webbed the white of it。 I found I could neither be angry with him； nor laugh。
〃You should know enough medicine to take better care of something like this。 Sit still now。〃 I made the rag into a press； held it gently but firmly to his face。 After a moment he relaxed。 I sponged away some dried blood。 There wasn't much； he had obviously cleaned himself up after this beating； but some of the cuts had continued to ooze blood。 I ran my fingers lightly down the lines of his jaw； and around his eye sockets。 At least no bone seemed damaged。 〃Who did this to you？〃 I asked him。
〃I walked into a series of doors。 Or the same one several times。 It depends on which door you ask。〃 He spoke glibly for someone with mashed lips。
〃That was a serious question；〃 I told him。
〃As was mine。〃
I glared at him again and he dropped his eyes。 For a moment neither of us spoke as I searched out a pot of salve Burrich had given me for cuts and scrapes。 〃I'd really like to know the answer；〃 I reminded him as I took the lid off the pot。 The familiar biting scent rose to my nostrils； and I suddenly missed Burrich with an amazing intensity。
〃As would I。〃 He flinched slightly under my touch as I applied the salve。 I knew it stung。 I also knew it worked。
〃Why do you ask such a question of me？〃 I finally demanded。
He considered a moment。 〃Because it is easier to ask of you than to ask Kettricken if she carries Verity's child。 As far as I can determine； Regal has shared his favors only with himself of late； so that dismisses him。 You or Verity； then； must be the father。〃
I looked at him blankly。 He shook his head sadly for me。 〃Cannot you feel it？〃 he asked in a near whisper。 He stared off in the distance dramatically。 〃Forces shift。 Shadows flutter。 Suddenly there is a rippling in the possibilities。 A reordering of the futures； as destinies multiply。 All paths diverge； and diverge again。〃 He looked back to me。 I smiled at him； thinking he jested； but his mouth was sober。 〃There is an heir to the Farseer line；〃 he said quietly。 〃I am certain of it。〃
Have you ever missed a step in the dark？ There is that sudden feeling of teetering on the edge； and no knowledge of how far you may fall。 I said； far too firmly； 〃I have fathered no child。〃
The Fool regarded me with a skeptical eye。 〃Ah；〃 he said with false heartiness。 〃Of course not。 Then it； must be Kettricken who is carrying。〃
〃It must；〃 I agreed； but my heart sank。 If Kettricken were pregnant； she would have no reason to conceal it。 Whereas Molly would。 And I had not been to see Molly in several nights。 Perhaps she had news for me。 I felt suddenly dizzied； but I forced myself to take a long calming breath。 〃Take your shirt off；〃 I told the Fool。 〃Let's see your chest。〃
〃I've seen it； thank you； and I assure you it's fine。 When they popped the bag over my head； I presume it was to provide a target。 They were most conscientious about striking nowhere else。〃
The brutality of what they had done to him sickened me into silence。 〃Who？〃 I finally managed to ask。
〃With a bag over my head？ e now。 Can you see through a bag？〃
〃No。 But you must have suspicions。〃
He canted his head at me in disbelief。 〃If you do not know what those suspicions are already； then you are the one with your head in a bag。 Let me cut a bit of a hole for you。 ‘We know you are false to the King； that you spy for Verity the pretender。 Send him no more messages； for if you do； we shall know of it。' 〃 He turned to stare into the fire； swung his heels briefly； thunk； thunk； thunk； against my clothing chest。
〃Verity the pretender？〃 I asked in outrage。
〃Not my words。 Theirs；〃 he pointed out。
I forced my anger down； tried to think。 〃Why would they suspect you spy for Verity？ Have you sent him messages？〃
〃I have a King；〃 he said softly。 〃Although he does not always remember he is my king。 You must look out for your king。 As I am sure you do。〃
〃What will you do？〃
〃What I have always done。 What else can I do？ I cannot stop doing what they mand me to stop； for I have never begun it。〃
A creeping certainty shivered up my spine。 〃And if they act again？〃
He gave a lifeless laugh。 〃There is no point to my worrying about it； for I cannot prevent it。 That is not to say I look forward to it。 This；〃 he said； with a half gesture toward his face。 〃This will heal。 What they did to my room will not。 I shall be weeks picking up that mess。〃
The words trivialized it。 A terrible hollow feeling welled up in me。 I had been in the Fool's tower chamber once。 It had been a long climb up a disused staircase； past the dust and litter of years； to a chamber that looked out over the parapets and contained a garden of wonder。 I thought of the bright fish swimming in the fat pots； the moss gardens in their containers； the tiny ceramic child； so meticulously cared for； in its cradle。 I closed my eyes as he added to the flames； 〃They were most thorough。 Silly me。 To think there was such a thing as a safe place in the world。〃
I could not look at him。 Save for his tongue； he was a defenseless person whose only drive was to serve his king。 And save the world。 Yet someone had smashed his world。 Worse； I suspected the beating he had taken was in revenge for something I had done。
〃I could help you set it to rights；〃 I offered quietly。
He shook his head tightly； quickly
