高山上的呼喊-go tell it on the mountain-第22部分
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‘That sure is a sorry little boy。’
He would weep again; his heart insisted; for now his weeping had begun; he would rageagain; said the shifting air; for the lions of rage had been unloosed; he would be in darkness again;in fire again; now that he had seen the fire and the darkness。 He was free—whom the Son sets freeis free indeed—he had only to stand fast in his liberty。 He was in battle no longer; this unfoldingLord’s day; with this avenue; these houses; the sleeping; staring; shouting people; but had enteredinto battle with Jacob’s angel; with the princes and the powers of the air。 And he was filled with ajoy; a joy unspeakable; whose roots; though he would not trace then on this new day of his life;were nourished by the wellspring of a despair not yet discovered。 The joy of the Lord is thestrength of His people。 Where joy was; there strength followed; where strength was; sorrow came—for ever? For ever and for ever; said the arm of Elisha; heavy on his shoulder。 And John tried tosee through the morning wall; to stare past the bitter houses; to tear the thousand gray veils of thesky away; and look into that heart—the monstrous heart which beat for ever; turning the astoundeduniverse; manding the stars to flee away before the sun’s red sandal; bidding the moon to waxand wane; and disappear; and e again; with a silver holding back the sea; and out ofmysteries abysmal; re…creating; each day; the earth。 That heart; that breath; without which was notanything made which was made。 Tears came into his eyes again; making the avenue shiver;causing the houses to shake—his heart swelled; lifted up; faltered; and was dumb。 Out of joystrength came; strength that was fashioned to bear sorrow; sorrow brought forth joy。 For ever? Thiswas Ezekiel’s wheel; in the middle of the burning air for ever—and the little wheel ran by faith;and the big wheel ran by the grace of God。
‘Elisha?’ he said。
‘If you ask Him to bear you up;’ said Elisha; as though he had read his thoughts; ‘He won’tnever let you fall。’
‘It was you;’ he said; ‘wasn’t it; who prayed me through?’
‘We was all praying; little brother;’ said Elisha; with a smile; ‘but yes; I was right over youthe whole time。 Look like the Lord had put you like a burden on my soul。’
‘Was I praying long?’ he asked。
Elisha laughed。 ‘Well; you started praying when it was night and you ain’t stopped prayingtill it was morning。 That’s a right smart time; it seems to me。’
John smiled; too; observing with some wonder that a saint of God could laugh。
‘Was you glad;’ he asked; ‘to see me at the altar?’
Then he wondered why he had asked this; and hoped Elisha would no think him foolish。
‘I was mighty glad;’ said Elisha soberly; ‘to see little Johnny lay his sins on the altar; layhis life on the altar and rise up; praising God。’
Something shivered in him as the word sin was spoken。 Tears sprang to his eyes again。
‘Oh;’ he said; ‘I pray God; I pray the Lord … to make me strong … to sanctify me wholly … andkeep me saved!’
‘Yes;’ said Elisha; ‘you keep that spirit; and I now the Lord’s going to see to it that you gethome all right。’
‘It’s a long way;’ John said slowly; ‘ain’t it? It’s a hard way。 It’s uphill all the way。’
‘You remember Jesus;’ Elisha said。 ‘You keep your mind on Jesus。 He went that way—upthe steep side of the mountain—and He was carrying the cross; and didn’t nobody help Him。 Hewent that way for us。 He carried that cross for us。’
‘But He was the Son of God;’ said John; ‘and He knew it。’
‘He knew it;’ said Elisha; ‘because He was willing to pay the price。 Don’t you know it;Johnny? Ain’t you willing to pay the price?’
‘That song they sing;’ said John; finally; ‘if it costs my life—is that the price?’
‘Yes。’ said Elisha; ‘that’s the price。’
Then John was silent; wanting to put the question another way。 And the silence wascracked; suddenly; by an ambulance siren; and a crying bell。 And they both look up as theambulance raced past them on the avenue on which no creature moved; save for the saints of Godbehind them。
‘But that’s the Devil’s price; too;’ said Elisha; as silence came again。 ‘The Devil; he don’task for nothing less than your life。 And he take it; too; and it’s lost for ever。 For ever; Johnny。 Youin darkness while you living and you in darkness when you dead。 Ain’t nothing but the love ofGod can make the darkness light。’
‘Yes;’ said John; ‘I remember。 I remember。’
‘Yes;’ said Elisha; ‘but you got to remember when the evil day es; when the floodrises; boy; and looks like your soul is going under。 You got to remember when the devil’s doing allhe can to make you forget。’
‘The Devil;’ he said; frowning and staring; ‘the Devil。 How many faces is the Devil got?’
‘He got as many faces;’ Elisha said;’ as you going to see between now and the time you layyour burden down。 And he got a lot more than that; but ain’t nobody seen them all。’
‘Except Jesus;’ John said then。 ‘Only Jesus。’
‘Yes;’ said Elisha; with a grave; sweet smile; ‘that’s the Man you got to call on。 That’s theMan who knows。’
They were approaching his house—his father’s house。 In a moment he must leave Elisha;step out from under his protecting arm; and walk alone into the house—alone with his mother andhis father。 And he was afraid。 He wanted to stop and turn to Elisha; and tell him … something forwhich he found no words。
‘Elisha——’ he began; and looked into Elisha’s face。 Then: ‘You pray for me? Please prayfor me?’
‘I been praying; little brother;’ Elisha said; ‘and I sure ain’t going to stop praying now。’
‘For me;’ persisted John; his tears falling; ‘for me。’
‘You know right well;’ said Elisa; looking at him; ‘I ain’t going to stop praying for thebrother what the Lord done give me。’
Then they reached the house; and paused; looking at each other; waiting。 John saw that thesun was beginning to stir; somewhere in the sky; the silence of the dawn would soon give way tothe trumpets of the morning。 Elisha took his arm from John’s shoulder and stood beside him;looking backward。 And John looked back; seeing the saints approach。
‘Service is going to be mighty late this morning;’ Elisha said; and suddenly grinned andyawned。
And John laughed。 ‘But you be there;’ he asked; ‘won’t you? This morning?’
‘Yes; little brother;’ Elisha laughed; ‘I’m going to be there。 I see I’m going to have to dosome running to keep up with you。’
And they watched the saints。 Now they all stood on the corner; where his Aunt Florencehad stopped to say good…bye。 All the women talked together; while his father stood a little apart。
His aunt and his mother kissed each other; as he had seen them do a hundred times; and then hisaunt turned to look for them; and waved。
They waved back; and she started slowly across the street; moving; he thought withwonder; like an old woman。
‘Well; she ain’t going to be out to service this morning; I tell you that;’ said Elisha; andyawned again。
‘And look like you going to be half asleep;’ John said ‘Now don’t you mess with me this morning;’ Elisha said; ‘because you ain’t got so holy Ican’t turn you over my knee。 I’s your big brother in the Lord—you just remember that。’
Now they were on the near corner。 His father and mother were saying good…bye to PrayingMother Washington; and Sister McCandless; and Sister Price。 The praying woman waved to them;and they waved back。 Then his mother and his father were alone; ing toward them‘Elisha;’ said John; ‘Elisha。’
‘Yes;’ said Elisha; ‘what you want now?’
John; staring at Elisha; struggled to tell him something more—struggled to say—all thatcould never be said。 Yet: ‘I was down in the valley;’ he dared; ‘I was by myself down there。 Iwon’t never forget。 May God forget me if I forget。’
Then his mother and his father were before them。 His mother smiled; and took Elisha’soutstretched hand。
‘Praise the Lord this morning;’ said Elisha。 ‘He done give us something to praise Him for。’
‘Amen;’ said his mother; praise the Lord!’
John moved up to the short; stone step; smiling a little; looking down on them。 His motherpassed him; and started into the house。
‘You better e on upstairs;’ she said; still smiling; ‘and take off them wet clothes。 Don’twant you catching cold。’
And her smile remained unreadable; he could not tell what it hid。 And to escape her eyes;he kissed her; saying; ‘Yes; Mama。 I’m ing。’
She stood behind him; in the doorway; waiting。
‘Praise the Lord; Deacon;’ Elisha said。 ‘See you at the morning service; Lord willing。’
‘Amen;’ said his father; ‘praise the Lord。’ He started up the stone steps; staring at John;who blocked the way。 ‘Go on upstairs; boy;’ he said; ‘like your mother told you。’
John looked at his father and moved from his path; stepping down into the street again。 Heput his hand on Elisha’s arm; feeling himself trembling; and his father at his back。
‘Elisha;’ he said; ‘no matter what happens to me; wh